I've had the hiccups. Not once but twice today. *cry*
What had shocked me was the fact that people actually read my blog (AHAHA) because... I don't know... I actually checked the stats for once and I was like WHOA SO MANY PEOPLE READ MY BLOG IN THE UNITED STATES AND GERMANY AND ISRAEL. So yeah just the shocking fact from me :)
Shoot I believe it is now New Years Eve in Australia (woo..!) and I am yet again still awake at 12:37am. Well better than yesterday. So straight to the point I hope everyone has a lovely New Year (my favourite number...13) and a wonderful holiday unlike me.
As you know there are three groups of people in the world: the ones who write New Year's revolutions, the ones who don't give a damn pickle salad and the ones who write them and don't even try. I am part of the group who doesn't even try but writes them anyway to give myself a reason to go through with this year. My resolutions? Right here:
•Do better: at what? I say this every year. Do better is soo going to get me somewhere in life. Do better as in academically? Socially? Emotionally? Why Jade you can't even figure out a good resolution. Do better. Work harder perhaps? Getting your lazy bum off the couch? Doing better overall at school? Doing better at avoiding so many rhetorical questions in one dot point?
•Organise: I actually tried *painful twinge*. I hate cleaning, organising (yes one of my not perfect spots in my first semester report) and being neat overall. There was this one situation at school during geography (which I'm pleasantly surprise about how good I am about it even though I don't really enjoy it at all I must say) where I had to read out my answer. Okay please note this: when I'm nervous I get jumpy and look more confident in a way and suddenly get this burst of energy. So I start like dancing around and all which is pretty funny and I have a tendency of laughing at myself in front of everyone. Which is pretty funny. Anyway away from this distraction and back to the topic, my teacher told me to read out my answer. So as I read it I stopped halfway. For a long time. And my teacher was like: "...is that it?" because I was doodling for most of the period because I had actually finished so I guess he expected more. So then I said something on the lines of: "...sorry sir I can't read what I wrote." Yes the whole class cracked up because usually my writing (it's famous for its illegibility) is legible to at least me. And I just couldn't read that one word. I was like: "Jade you are screwed if you have to take notes because you can't even read your prepared work" and I just sart laughing at myself if something like that happens. I laugh about how pathetic I am. And I truly guess that I am very pathetic for a human being. Okay I drifted off a lot away from the topic. Okiedokie artichokey so the only time I ever cleaned my room was when I realised I lost my ine piece of paper which had all my French colours I had learnt in class on it which I needed to revise my French (mentioned in my blog "Wii are Hilarious" and this is the reason why I stopped at Unit 6 when I was on a roll. Literally. I used those cool exercise balls as my seat and bounced around in it) So I had to sort out my desk. Torture. In the end I couldn't find it but the good thing is that I used it as an excuse (because I was good and cleaned my room without my mum forcing me to unsuccessfully) to go and buy my "White Collar" DVDs today...yesterday because it's 12:54 now...which I ended up buying and OH MY GOD THEY ARE AMAZING. And yeah Matt's face takes up the whole cover of season 2's front but that's okay because Matt Bomer is amazing. That was a huge distraction from the topic of "organisation"
•Slow Down the Chocolates and Icecreams and Cakes and Whatnot: Not happening sorry "Beneficial-Jade"
•Try Harder in Weak Areas: I'm not very nice. I could work on that. *cough*. I'm the dead guinea pig in science so I could work on that too because it's just a plain hopeless subject. OH YES WE GET LAPTOPS IM SO EXCITED AND I HAVE NO MORE MUSIC LESSONS AHAHA I HATE -wait hate is a strong word- STRONGLY DISLIKE MUSIC WOOO *celebrates* Umm French and English needs help too. :(
Oh I have more good news: My pillow ban is over!!!!!! I have never used so many exclamation marks in my life. Well if you didn't know my mum has punished me for destroying my eyesight (because I sleep face down sometimes) by taking away my extra two big fluffy pillows. She still hasn't given them back but she upgraded my pillow now. It smells funny so I don't use it so I sleep on my hands until the smell dies out or I lose my nose somehow (by getting my epic wand and walking up to the neighbour's house who recently had a child and go all AVADA KEDAVRA on it). Sorry baby I didn't mean that :( You should be sleeping now. (1:08am)
Yay dream time with JADEISTIRED. *clapclap* Hey kids I'm here to blog about a story. This story is one you will never forget. *opens book* On the night of Christmas Jade was sleeping in her bed. She was in a dream zone. Now children listen carefully. In her dream Jade was at home and it was daylight. Her mither was peacefully sleeping and she and her brother were trying to sneak snacks into their rooms to eat. So the two children tiptoed to the kitchen past the sleeping mum towards the food cupboard. They were successful. Inside they had taken each two strawberry and vanilla LCM's and a honeycomb chocolate bar. *DA DA DAAN* And poor Jade's mind was so confused the dream changed. It was the last day of school, the day which she never has attended in her life. It was history class and little Jade has forgotten that an assignment was due today. Poor Jade hade to quickly scribble notes about frogs (or cane toads) behind her food technology assignment on strawberrty (oh by the way, she had failed- not in reality) In class, as an excuse to escape her shameful nightmare, she and a classmate were asked by their Japanese teacher (yes in History class) to go and return their Japanese textbooks (which in reality, she really never gave it back). So Friend A and Jade left to go downstairs to the Visual Arts room where all the Japanese books were stored. Now in Dream land or Wonderland, not everything is normal. See from then on children, they were suddenly lost in Central Station where they were afraid, lost, cold, hungry and tired (loljk Jade eats too much she's full). Now suddenly THE SCARY SENIORS CAME. And they just made some weird perfume. Poor Jade sneezes when there is perfume but not in Dream land she doesn't. While walking back upstairs towards the history classroom they ended up in a department store area where they met Friends B & C. Friend A has gone MIA *audience gasps* and then B decides to go and buy a lollipop. She askes nice amazing Jade to come with her so C is now missing as well. The lollipop shop was closed so sad B and Jade walked down towards the Visual Arts room until they saw Taylor Swift on the left in front of MYER (is my store). Amazed Jade went up and asked for an autograph and then everything on the right of me disappeared and became the sea. There was a canoe so Jade stood in it. Personally, earthlings, I think Friend B drowned. When Swift went ontothe boat too MYER disappeared and it was all ocean. Wait it may be a harbour because you can see Sydney on the horizon. Swift was actually a shark hunter. She is evil. Well actually she was nice because before a monster shark could eat Jade she harpooned it. Wait earthlings, over the horizon it isn't Sydney. It's New York. Apparently Jade lives in Manhattan. Swift told her that if she wants to survive she has to go and live in Queens. Jade said no. But Swift took her anyway...TO DOOM. When arriving on land, Swift ditched her (personal thanks- Jade totally needs to face reality that dumb child). Dumbfounded Jade is sad. Jade walked to a nursing home and found her aged parents sitting on a roof eating wedges with no sour cream. Jade hates noodles but wedges are okay. She can see two bright yellow moons in the sky. Two yellow moons are bad. Very bad. Jade knew this. They were both quarter moons. This means evil. Very evil. Twilight (name of the monster that suddenly attacked) came and everyone turned to kids except for Jade (lol like always). Twilight wanted to show how much pain humans bring onto others. He (or she. Or if it's a transgender...) started to showflashbacks of death of dinosaurs and of Swift killing the poor monster shark. Jade said sorry. He got angry and then knitted everyone with spaghetti using two trees until we were trapped and couldn't move. He put the trees back down into their holes. He started on a long speech (like all villains do just before the hero escapes) about killing all stupid humans and then jade has a cool idea. Since she is hanging on a twig she lets go and drags the spaghetti, ripping it. *shuts book* Hey sorry children the book ended because someone ever so kindly DECIDED TO PLAY ANNOYING MICHAEL BUBLÉ (i pronounce it ss bubble now because he makes me upset) SO EARLY IN THE MORNING ON THE STEREO >:( why was his christmas album on sale?
Well goodnight earthlings its 1:36am and I need my beauty sleep. (loljk. Beauty isn't even a part of sleep)
Kind Regards,
TiredTiramisu
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